I'm lucky to have a husband who exercises incredible self control when it comes to his eyes, on the other hand, I'm not completely ignorant or naive either. He is a man. He is a sinner. He is human.
With that said, I am really struggling with the thin line of wanting to be sexy for him and wanting to represent for him. Of course I want my husbands eyes all on me and as a woman in this messed up world, that often seems to scream "dress in fitted clothes that draw attention."
The pursuit of being a Godly woman though, calls me to be covered and NOT dressing so to draw a mans eye toward me. SO FRUSTRATING. Sometimes I wonder if God understands what its like to be a woman and try to keep a mans attention by wearing cargo pants and a size medium top. I do though have a greater desire to please God than man and my desire for John is to represent him well.
I had never thought of how I represent him until a close friend and I were discussing this. I never want anyone to see me "looking hot" and have a negative thought about John's wife. I am a reflection of him and the last thing I want is for anyone to think he married a haughty or insecure woman.
Yes, I will continue to wear heels and jewelery and jeans that are my size, but I have to check my heart at the closet door. My heart should first say, "is what I'm wearing glorifying to God and a true reflection of John?" He is worth the best representation that I can give.
1 comment:
You are a stunning woman, both inside and out and should be proud of how you look everyday. I agree that there is a line we can all cross sometimes, but it seems to me that your husband (like mine) would mention to you if he felt you weren't representing him in the most God fearing fashion.
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