I sat at the kitchen table this morning eating my eggs and reading my bible in James ch.1. I love starting my day this way....it makes summer truly bliss!
Today was our first foster meeting with a group of professionals that work with Michael. As my eggs churned in my stomach, hanging on to every gut wrenching detail of his story, the bible verses I had read seaped back into my spirit. Thankfully.
I had read earlier this morning about being slow to speak, slow to anger, and quick to listen. I also read about how our anger does not produce the righteousness of God.
Fast forward to the meeting.....more than enough was said to make me literally disgusted and sick to my stomach. I fought back tears through the entire meeting....trying to maintain my level of anger and my tongue which so quickly wanted to speak. My hope was that when I left the meeting, the other adults in the room would perceive me as a Christ follower of grace, composure, and strength. I felt none of these but the Holy Spirit kept me together until my flesh got to the car and let loose in the privacy of my little dinged and scratched Hyundai Elantra. The tears came and the grieving for sin over flowed in my heart.
Our world is so entirely corrupt. It always has been and always will be until the final judgement. By only God's grace can we make humane and rational decisions. With God's wisdom we can make choices that are right and pure. With God's strength we can endure the hurt that this fallen world has to offer.
I need Grace. Strength. Wisdom.
...and I need it by December when Michael gets here! Pray Pray Pray!!
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