Ok, I'm not really pregnant but I feel socially pressured to say that. I feel surrounded by diapers, raddles and baby bumps....I have nightmares about them! I work with 7 women who are all expecting in the next 3-4 months. I have several close friends that are pregnant, and now that I'm 27 I feel an entirely new pressure to try out the pregnancy thing. Society pushes this whole idea of marriage....NOW baby. So many of my students parents e-mail or ask me at conferences, "So when you are thinking of having kids?" Some days I'm thinking...."ummmm...after spending 2 hours with your child....I'm good for another 10 years."
I'm holding out. It just doesn't feel right at this time in our marriage---there is so much that we still want to experience before permanent parenting begins. Ya know, the kind you can't return?
For now, I'm going to remain content, because I do truly feel content, and stop feeling like I shouldn't feel content. Part of me feels guilty for NOT wanting to be pregnant---but I really don't think I want to be. Until I know for sure that I do, I feel it best to just wait.
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